Dear future missunpredictable,
Please let me know if you did move on, what happened? I wanna be stronger than over, just to move on.
Regards,
The current missunpredictable
Dear past missunpredictable,
You should have closed yourself up and threw the key away. Remember the chest? It was your sign of no return. Now, you shall be damned for this period of time and future missunpredictable, NEVER LOOK BACK. You did what you have to, move on; move along.
Regards,
The current missunpredictable.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
I know how I sound like now.
Ok, I know that I'm gonna sound like a Taitai again; but I'm leaving.
So y'all, take care alright.
So y'all, take care alright.
Monday, June 28, 2010
I get don't get it.
Why is it that at the end of the day, when you are truely upset; it is always the some other guy who walks around RANDOMLY asks, "How's your day?" that makes you smile? It just does not make any fucking sense, the equation just don't add up. Do guys love doing that? RANDOMLY asking girls "How are you?" so that maybe sometime in the week, they hope to score her?
It is so fucked up. And why are women so emotional? Is it because we are made that way? I really hate the fact that I hope, because it always kills me. I went to take an aura photo yesterday and other than sharing it with people who understood it, I wanted someone else to know. It's killing me but I know that I have to do it.
I am also sick of the fact that everyone of us; ladies, we are constantly asking ourselves what went wrong, and puts it on self-blame. It really will damage our self-esteem in the long run. That's why we end up so insecure in next relationship, because of our emotional bagguage. It tugs us so down that when try to be up about it, we will only sink lower at the end of the day. It's heavy so maybe that's why we feel breathless when the next relationship comes.
And why is it that when guys are concerned, they just stalk them whenever they can, ideally online? I know that there at least two guys who constantly checks on what I write and it irks me. It's like what my ex said, that is only care and concern that I can give right now, knowing how you are doing for the time being.
Seriously, WTF for? So what if you do know if I am happy, upset or hungry (intended) ? How is it going to be beneficial to you when the information is one way? Or is it the fact that it satisfies your curiosity that made you smile? Guys just take in information and women willingly give it, who is at the losing end? US.
I guess I'm just tired of being upset at the end of the day. I want to feel like smiling is not a chore, but something that comes from the heart. I think when I was searching for that Joanne 3 years back; I was searching for that sincere smile I found in Cambodia. That was when someone looked at me with my short, long-tailed hair style, my specs, and t-shirt and tribal pants and said that "You are beautiful" that stirred me up. It also made me realized that we remembered things more when we are down.
When you are happy, you don't think so much about it, you just smile and enjoy it. But when you are mad or upset, you remember it best. It makes you think a whole lot, to gather points to, make references to and it makes you want to understand the situation which ideally in the first place was not meant to be understood, that's why we got so bewildered by it.
I really don't know how I feel now; everything was clear and now it's blurred.
It is so fucked up. And why are women so emotional? Is it because we are made that way? I really hate the fact that I hope, because it always kills me. I went to take an aura photo yesterday and other than sharing it with people who understood it, I wanted someone else to know. It's killing me but I know that I have to do it.
I am also sick of the fact that everyone of us; ladies, we are constantly asking ourselves what went wrong, and puts it on self-blame. It really will damage our self-esteem in the long run. That's why we end up so insecure in next relationship, because of our emotional bagguage. It tugs us so down that when try to be up about it, we will only sink lower at the end of the day. It's heavy so maybe that's why we feel breathless when the next relationship comes.
And why is it that when guys are concerned, they just stalk them whenever they can, ideally online? I know that there at least two guys who constantly checks on what I write and it irks me. It's like what my ex said, that is only care and concern that I can give right now, knowing how you are doing for the time being.
Seriously, WTF for? So what if you do know if I am happy, upset or hungry (intended) ? How is it going to be beneficial to you when the information is one way? Or is it the fact that it satisfies your curiosity that made you smile? Guys just take in information and women willingly give it, who is at the losing end? US.
I guess I'm just tired of being upset at the end of the day. I want to feel like smiling is not a chore, but something that comes from the heart. I think when I was searching for that Joanne 3 years back; I was searching for that sincere smile I found in Cambodia. That was when someone looked at me with my short, long-tailed hair style, my specs, and t-shirt and tribal pants and said that "You are beautiful" that stirred me up. It also made me realized that we remembered things more when we are down.
When you are happy, you don't think so much about it, you just smile and enjoy it. But when you are mad or upset, you remember it best. It makes you think a whole lot, to gather points to, make references to and it makes you want to understand the situation which ideally in the first place was not meant to be understood, that's why we got so bewildered by it.
I really don't know how I feel now; everything was clear and now it's blurred.
Sick of being controlled.
I wanna be in control of my life now. I don't know if this will turn out alright; but just let me try ok?
STOP CONTROLLING ME! Let me be as I am.
Please, I beg.
STOP CONTROLLING ME! Let me be as I am.
Please, I beg.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
101 on how to make a guy dump you without letting him feeling guilty.
1. Tell him that you have been fucking around with guys; have fuckbuddies.
2. Being emotional; go crazy everywhere- on tumblr, blogger, twitter and facebook.
3. Smoke, furiously.
4. Appear online all the time.
5. Try getting pet names for each other. The sweeter the better.
6. Name his *ahems*.
7. Pretend that you cherish every single thing that he gave you. Like, LOVE them.
8. Be persistent in irritating him; hog him whenever you can.
9. Cry and get emotional with him. Just cry or sound like you are crying, it'll do.
10. Be stalkerish. Just stalk whatever that he has, make sure that he doesn't know.
Wait for the results.
2. Being emotional; go crazy everywhere- on tumblr, blogger, twitter and facebook.
3. Smoke, furiously.
4. Appear online all the time.
5. Try getting pet names for each other. The sweeter the better.
6. Name his *ahems*.
7. Pretend that you cherish every single thing that he gave you. Like, LOVE them.
8. Be persistent in irritating him; hog him whenever you can.
9. Cry and get emotional with him. Just cry or sound like you are crying, it'll do.
10. Be stalkerish. Just stalk whatever that he has, make sure that he doesn't know.
Wait for the results.
This dude is awesome.
"Cooler Than Me" - Mike Posner (Ukulele Cover)
If you can make fun of yourself or make a mistake and dare to post it up, you have balls man.
I'm coming back.
I am starting back on my new journey and this is still me. Fuck all those posts beforehand. He doesn't matter now in my life and I shall burn that box one day, I swear. So what am I doing now?
Smoking and I was damn aware that I am left with 3 sticks and today is my third day. I wanted to start writing in my diary for like the number nth time but I find myself lazy, my wardrobe pretty messed up with new clothes that I bought and haven't been wearing. I wasn't out for like 2 days; am I going mad? Yes dear, I am.
I also said that I NEED to be doing up my passport before I'm leaving for a day trip soon and I didn't. I will definitely get it done by tomorrow, god kill me if I don't.
And I happen to think that I am interesting this way. Seriously, when I read back on my previous posts. When I am open with who I am, I can be so funny. When I am not bothered by people who are gonna judge, I am pretty fine that way and people respected me for that.
I need to fucking love myself more; else I will be trapped in another whirlpool all over again and readers (if you are still there, stalking; whatever), you know me.
Not gonna let another guy to take my heart down. Been through that and I turned out to be stronger than before, I know damn well that I can do that too. I have so much capabilities that even my resume won't be able to take it.
So really, what the hell am I doing now? Being happily unemployed and living my life in a SHITHOLE, well, it wasn't as bad as the last one *points at my previous job*, I seriously think that I can do better.
Two things that I'm gonna get at the end of the day, a monroe piercing and a tattoo for Fifi, and I am going to research on whatever just to make sure that I'd be safe and sound at the end of the day. And if that comes off as sucessful, I might just take my bike license, for real this time.
And after that, maybe a decent digital camera to work myself way through; not a DSLR mind you, that just scares the muthafucking shit outta me. Yea, I miss you old blog, because you know me best, and I know how to work you like the tech noob that I already was.
Anyways, to add on, no more London Boy. Since he wants to decide, I'm cool. I'm good to do whatever now. ;)
Right now, I am going to end off with a positive note.
WHAZZUP!
missunpredictable, out.
Smoking and I was damn aware that I am left with 3 sticks and today is my third day. I wanted to start writing in my diary for like the number nth time but I find myself lazy, my wardrobe pretty messed up with new clothes that I bought and haven't been wearing. I wasn't out for like 2 days; am I going mad? Yes dear, I am.
I also said that I NEED to be doing up my passport before I'm leaving for a day trip soon and I didn't. I will definitely get it done by tomorrow, god kill me if I don't.
And I happen to think that I am interesting this way. Seriously, when I read back on my previous posts. When I am open with who I am, I can be so funny. When I am not bothered by people who are gonna judge, I am pretty fine that way and people respected me for that.
I need to fucking love myself more; else I will be trapped in another whirlpool all over again and readers (if you are still there, stalking; whatever), you know me.
Not gonna let another guy to take my heart down. Been through that and I turned out to be stronger than before, I know damn well that I can do that too. I have so much capabilities that even my resume won't be able to take it.
So really, what the hell am I doing now? Being happily unemployed and living my life in a SHITHOLE, well, it wasn't as bad as the last one *points at my previous job*, I seriously think that I can do better.
Two things that I'm gonna get at the end of the day, a monroe piercing and a tattoo for Fifi, and I am going to research on whatever just to make sure that I'd be safe and sound at the end of the day. And if that comes off as sucessful, I might just take my bike license, for real this time.
And after that, maybe a decent digital camera to work myself way through; not a DSLR mind you, that just scares the muthafucking shit outta me. Yea, I miss you old blog, because you know me best, and I know how to work you like the tech noob that I already was.
Anyways, to add on, no more London Boy. Since he wants to decide, I'm cool. I'm good to do whatever now. ;)
Right now, I am going to end off with a positive note.
WHAZZUP!
missunpredictable, out.
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