My bad habits.

I think that I just need to write them so that I feel more sane and less perfect.

1. I like to have reading materials when I do my business in the loo.

2. I can be lazy when I wanna need to remove my make-up, sometimes I sleep with it on.

3. I like sleeping on the couch.

4. I like dancing in the bathroom.

5. I can smoke wherever actually, as long as there isn't anyone elderly that I am blood related to around.

6. I am a messy girl, I don't tidy lotsa my things in my room, or my wardrobe or my bed for that matter.

7. I love procrastinating.

8. I am straightforward, blunt and very to the point. I hate beating around the bush; it really doesn't matter who you are, I will tell it like it is. This is something that I will never change. Hence, I don't have good EQ skills, whatever.

9. I actually like pimples and pain; so tattoos and piercings attract me a whole lot.

10. I like money but I don't LOVE money. I like to shop and I don't care if anyone else thinks less of it.

-----

There, right at the top of my head. I hate people who are so trapped and well, "close-minded", because I don't judge or rather, I try not to. It's okay to be who you are, to be weird, dumbfounded, stumble on bricks and to enjoy.

If you are always stuck in stressful situations, it's gonna just freak you out, over and over again. If you so restricted by rules and regulations then just forget it and move on.

I am planning on something now, well, more on enjoying life. So yeah! I will update on that again, I think. Anything else, I am still smiling- at the end of the day. It's always a battle, but if you walk out confidently at the end of it, you are the winner.

The mess don't matter.

Thanks pop.

Now I'm gonna count down to the days that I will move out. Seriously, I need to know how to take care of myself in the outside world. I will get a fucking full-time job and move out because it ain't worth it. Suffocation is all that I've been getting.

You have never ever asked me about what I wanted and all you ever do is to raise your hand out for moolah. I'm sick of it. You'll see, I will be capable with my two own hands and two own feet.

I will work my ass off to prove you wrong.

突然累了

吃飯吃到睡了
我開車開到傻了
我看書看到你了
開始懷疑我怎麽了
説話說到吐了
我寫歌寫到瘋了

我累了.

I think reality really pushes me.

Erm ya, I'm starting to work part-time next week, for two jobs. I think that I will be happier working part-time anyday. Yes, I'm all smiley today, and I initially was preparing it to be a bad one. Nope, not even the rain could break my smile.

I also have some uncensored stuff to share. Yes, apparently my life has been either interesting or complicated, never simple. I can on so many wild trips, meeting so many different people that i just can't stop well, moving.

My self prophecies are fulfilling me, as usual. I get everything I wanted out of them, of short-term planning, well almost everything. I'm not THAT greedy right? It seems like if I want to, I can get more guys than I ask for and if I don't, I am fine with it.

Well then there is just one guy, when I was talking to him, I feel completely me, myself and nothing else. When I talk about him to my friends, I got dissed. When I talking about leaving him, I got dissed as well. At the end of the day, when I know what I want, it was too late and now we aren't even friends, are we?

We do have to lose something to move on right? But of course, not without regrets. Once again, sorry. That's the least that I could offer now.

I'm gonna let time slowly pass.

"It was perfect; long, pink and amazing" Samantha Jones/ Carrie Bradshaw - Sex In the City

This is how I feel now.

Tonight I made a fool of myself. I guess I just needed this; after 6 months of storing, distracting myself from the world. Or even 3 years of pain that I wasn't willing to share, it just came out like an outburst of of nowhere. Everything was stored in my tiny heart. Maybe I just needed to be weak, to heal; all over again.

I will smile again, I promise.